the difference

I once met a man who, over a nice Italian dinner, explained to me that he had once taken a philosophy course years ago. "Philosophy is bullshit" he said, "and after I figured that out I just bullshitted on my final paper and got an A. That confirmed it for me: its all bullshit." Smiling smugly he finished his glass of wine and looked at me with the look as if to say: I've got your number.

It reminded me of the time I turned away from physics. I was a senior in high school and was prone to moodiness and depression. I became convinced that the physics course I was taking was bullshit also. I closed my mind, turned on my walkman, and dropped out of the physics course.

Years have gone by and I look back upon that moment of my turning away and I am ashamed of myself. I am ashamed that I assumed that my ignorance was superior to knowledge. I am ashamed that I turned my back on the great privelege given to me to learn, to know something of great value.

And that is the difference between He and I. Nothing more than a sense of shame.